Monday, April 30, 2012

Harby For President!

What to do when the bogus political choice for your country is between Wall Street's candidate of the Vampire Squid and Wall Street's Vampire Squid, Jr.? Why, vote for a real tentacled space alien of malign intent! We hereby nominate Harby the Reaper.

Apparently, the Harbster resigned from the rEApers after the implosion of one of their videogames. But science fiction's loss is America's gain!

Candidate Harby has all the crucial qualities to be President of this dying Empire: no compunction about killing, booming loudspeaker-voice, twin laser cannons, and an armored carapace the size of the Sears Tower. Heck, why bother to elect someone to run an unconstitutional war machine, when you can elect the war machine itself?

Harby also has terrific slogans: "Nothing Says Democracy Like Twin Laser Cannons", "No Child Left Unhusked", "50,000 Years of Successful Galactic Colonialism", and "Our 3 Colors Are Still Better Than Your 2 Party State".

Tomorrow: a May Day surprise!

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